First of all thanks to so many of you for reaching out with supportive and kind words. I re-read them often to get myself through the day. Thanks specifically to some of the Hudson ladies (Toot, Carol, Sue, Holly) who have worked tirelessly over the past month to help Mom transition into a new home. Thanks "big" Paula for stepping in as superwoman and my 2nd Mom - how many texts do we send a day?! Thanks Aunt Jeannie and Aunt Dolly for keeping her safe and loving her. Thanks Bob for letting her still remain a part of the "working" society. Thanks Corey Peters for the gift of my last flight home - priceless. Thanks Leon and ADP for being flexible and understanding - so fortunate for my job. And a big thanks to my friends in San Diego and Home for the text messages that arrive at just the right moment.
We moved Mom into Red Cedar Canyon Assisted Living in Hudson last Thursday after her neurology appointment. She was very adamant against it on Wednesday but we were blessed with a miracle Thursday when she agreed to it. While I was home over the weekend we had lots of visitors with positive attitudes which made her happy to "show it off". I purchased her some basics like hangers, organizers, etc... so she would settle in. Also bought a giant TV so she could see and hung curtains (thanks Jim). Over the course of the weekend and past few days the "conversation" turned from only negative (too loud here, my furniture was ruined in move, or I'm buying a condo) to enjoying the apartment, neighbors and meals! The next few weeks are crucial for her to settle, get into a routine, and be Happy! The more visitors the more likely this is to happen. Pat Sherley is the Director at Red Cedar and to whom I owe so much gratitude. Her staff has been flexible with the move in and are keeping an eye on Mom. If you have specific questions about the place, Pat can answer!
She still believes that I might be getting a big career promotion in our Minneapolis office and potentially moving back so that's why we have a 2 bedroom apartment. Unfortunately this isn't happening but we'll play the story longer.
What to do!
-VISIT!!! Old and new friends! No restrictions on times, just let her know and she'll come downstairs to the Main Door (express this to her) to get you. Take her for lunch, have dinner at Red Cedar (food is great), meet Sister Mary Jane (her favorite neighbor), have sleepovers (spare bedroom in her place), watch TV-Movie Theater - good activity she enjoys!-Walks - she likes to stay fit so go for a long walk/hike while it's nice outside-Anything you would have invited her to before - invite her now.-Grocery shopping - she doesn't buy herself much but if you're at the store and think of it... here are some favorites: Herdez SPICY salsa, tortilla chips, Tropicana 50/50 Orange Juice, Lean Cuisines (or anything similar in brand), Wheat bread, Salad kits, soups, mashed potatoes, grapes, wheat thins
Help List:I've been told to ask for specifics on what I need and also been asked by numerous people how they can help. If anyone has suggestions or wants to take on the task please let me know and I can give you more details:
-Helping get instructions from Pat @ Red Cedar typed/printed for Mom on: dining hours, menu, how to use shower, TV, DVD player, wifi internet, cleaning schedule, washer/dryer, daily reminder sheet of: shower, parking spot, turn off curling iron, blow out candles, etc...-Someone to be "me" while I'm in Maui so I can put my phone away a little more than I can these days. August 6th-13th I'm gone - just looking for someone to be Mom's check in point.-Shelving system in bathroom closet for storage to be more accessible - gooft need but will make it easier and organized when more things arrive from CA.-Shipping/moving remaining furniture/decor from Palm Springs - not too much furniture, more decor that she wants - need a shipping company or a mover - will pay for expenses-Finding a Doctor at Hudson Physicians to take her on -Attorney to do free Conservator/Guardianship in Wisconsin - must be WI licensed-Frequent flyer miles - Delta, United, US Airways, Southwest - and helping book upcoming flights - like a "travel agent"-Finding an organization/person to help Mom have a "job" related to her specialty (decorating) so that she feels like a productive member of society-A Christmas tree/ornament/decor wholesaler or company willing to help donate some of these items. I have a feeling Red Cedar Canyon will be on the Tour of Homes! per Robin Kavitz - This would be a great task she could help residents with starting this fall-Picture project - I'm starting a huge picture project - if anyone wants to assist in collecting pictures from Midwest people to get them to me that'd be awesome!
What to do!
-VISIT!!! Old and new friends! No restrictions on times, just let her know and she'll come downstairs to the Main Door (express this to her) to get you. Take her for lunch, have dinner at Red Cedar (food is great), meet Sister Mary Jane (her favorite neighbor), have sleepovers (spare bedroom in her place), watch TV-Movie Theater - good activity she enjoys!-Walks - she likes to stay fit so go for a long walk/hike while it's nice outside-Anything you would have invited her to before - invite her now.-Grocery shopping - she doesn't buy herself much but if you're at the store and think of it... here are some favorites: Herdez SPICY salsa, tortilla chips, Tropicana 50/50 Orange Juice, Lean Cuisines (or anything similar in brand), Wheat bread, Salad kits, soups, mashed potatoes, grapes, wheat thins
Help List:I've been told to ask for specifics on what I need and also been asked by numerous people how they can help. If anyone has suggestions or wants to take on the task please let me know and I can give you more details:
-Helping get instructions from Pat @ Red Cedar typed/printed for Mom on: dining hours, menu, how to use shower, TV, DVD player, wifi internet, cleaning schedule, washer/dryer, daily reminder sheet of: shower, parking spot, turn off curling iron, blow out candles, etc...-Someone to be "me" while I'm in Maui so I can put my phone away a little more than I can these days. August 6th-13th I'm gone - just looking for someone to be Mom's check in point.-Shelving system in bathroom closet for storage to be more accessible - gooft need but will make it easier and organized when more things arrive from CA.-Shipping/moving remaining furniture/decor from Palm Springs - not too much furniture, more decor that she wants - need a shipping company or a mover - will pay for expenses-Finding a Doctor at Hudson Physicians to take her on -Attorney to do free Conservator/Guardianship in Wisconsin - must be WI licensed-Frequent flyer miles - Delta, United, US Airways, Southwest - and helping book upcoming flights - like a "travel agent"-Finding an organization/person to help Mom have a "job" related to her specialty (decorating) so that she feels like a productive member of society-A Christmas tree/ornament/decor wholesaler or company willing to help donate some of these items. I have a feeling Red Cedar Canyon will be on the Tour of Homes! per Robin Kavitz - This would be a great task she could help residents with starting this fall-Picture project - I'm starting a huge picture project - if anyone wants to assist in collecting pictures from Midwest people to get them to me that'd be awesome!
As for driving, ideally we'd like her to just be driving in Hudson area and eventually no more. The neurologist (she has a different name for him) was firm and frank during the appointment - he will take her license away when we see fit. She is taking an assessment on August 5th at the Courage Center for them to evaluate.
The diagnosis isn't changing as well as the fact there is no cure. Every week - actually every day - is a new learning experience. While she seemed to be slipping away more in the past few weeks, she has settled into her home and seems better in the past few days. I hope less stress, her own bed, more sleep and a routine will help stabilize the situation
I myself am keeping my head above water with the support system I have. The travel in the past 2 months has been exhausting but I hope now once a month for a weekend visit is good. Work is understanding for which I'm thankful. I prefer my job over my reality at this point. Additionally I won a trip to Maui for Presidents Club all paid for. I decided I needed this trip for my mental sanity and I'm very EXCITED!
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